Monday, August 29, 2016

#100 days of motherlove

This past weekend I delivered my eldest to the University of Delaware to begin her next amazing adventure.  
It was a huge day; a full day, of excitement, trepidation, exhaustion, nostalgia, worry, celebration, sweat and some tears.  

But isn't this what we, as parents want, to have nourished and fortified our children, preparing to launch them on their personal adventure? 

That was the idea that stayed with me the most as I helped Maya unroll an area rug in her dorm room.  Here I was, living a day that I had dreaded because I thought I'd be a blubbering mess, however I was more proud than sad, more excited for Maya than anxious.  

So when the time came for me and her sister to head back home I didn't weep, I welled up a bit, but it all felt right.  
I am really happy with the college that Maya choose; Newark seems like a manageable town and her roommate is truly lovely.  
What more can a mother ask for?  
(granted, I have also gathered as many the guardian angels that I can to be with her and protect her) 

So I felt ok as I drove north, except for the fact that I had not given her all the advice that I wanted to give her.  

When she graduated I had started a 'book' full of advice; some obvious, some unique to me, some recipes and family secrets, some reflections, many quotes and other nuggets of knowledge that I wanted to send along with her.  
But thanks to life, commitments and my desire to create the 'perfect' book, 
the book was never created; 
it was started, but never finished. 

But somewhere in the middle of New Jersey it dawned on me that she can ALWAYS use motherly advise (can't we all), and that maybe doing it in a different format than a book may work better for us both!! 
Also during the past week, as Maya's departure loomed larger and larger, I stumbled upon Elle Luna's book, 
while last minute college shopping at Urban Outfitters. 

I knew of Elle Luna and had seriously considered participating in her #100daysproject but hadn't yet, so I picked it up this beautiful book and took a peak.  
"In my own life, I've found that things appear at the ideal time.
Not before. And not after. Consider the possibility that this book
made its way into your hands because you wanted it to." pg. xi

This was first page I read ... 

I bought the book and dove in.
This book is about dreams; 'must' over 'should'; just doing; following your passions; 
a journey that I fervently believe in and one which I wholeheartedly want my daughters to follow.  
This book talks about all the possible pitfalls and/or sucesses that come from following your inner voice, but that in the end it is the only choice that will make one feel alive.
So with Elle Luna's words empowering me and the knowledge of how she found her must by creating a 100days project, I decided that I will parcel off my thoughts and advice to Maya over the next 100 days.
 I am going to start my own personal 100 day project, sharing my thoughts and advice with my daughter as she embarks on this new chapter of her personal journey.
 I will post said nuggets on my 'dailydressproject' blog, now called #100daysofmotherlove. 

And even though I love!! the idea of a book, when I really think about the receipiant, a child of the computer age, posting on a blog seems more appropriate.  
In fact most likely I should do this all on tumblr ... but I don't know how. 

But first, let me start by saying how ultimately proud I am of my eldest, navigating her first 18 years as a bushwhacker, teaching her parents what it means to parent, and as an ambassador for her little sister, and surviving.  
When Maya entered this world I knew that she was/is an old soul. She knows much and has much to learn.  So I offer these 100 posts as some guidelines, sign posts, suggestions.  I don't have answers but, I do have passions and dreams and some experience which I want to share. 
And to Maya,
Buckle up, travel safe!!!  
love you more!!!! Mom!!!